


Tomorrow, If You Let Me

by Coop_Scoop



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Background Case, Kissing, M/M, Mentions of Rape, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Swearing, bearded Rafael Barba, mentioned fingering, mentioned sex, sonny wants rafael
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-05-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:15:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24327904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coop_Scoop/pseuds/Coop_Scoop
Summary: Sonny is working fine. He loves being the ADA, until a case makes him go back to the Precinct. He has to tell Liv, but when he walks in she is on FaceTime to Rafael Barba. It was his case and well he needs help, turns out the help is welcome. Although the resurgence of the feelings he had for the man were not.It doesn't help he has the most generic soulmate mark and he doesn't know if he has met them. He has heard his words multiple times and only has the handwriting to go with. He just hopes it is the one person who has taken a whole part of his heart to himself.
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr.
Kudos: 35





	Tomorrow, If You Let Me

It was completely ridiculous. Sonny couldn’t wrap his mind around the fact that Liv had been speaking to Barba, he had walked in to talk to her about a case that Barba had worked; and now they were trying to get the boy off. They had the worst excuse for trying to throw out his conviction, it had been almost five years since he had been sentenced. And they are saying because the boy had such a rough time in prison and it had only been a thirty second indiscretion. And he shouldn't have to pay for it. 

And when he saw him. A full beard and more crinkles by his eyes, he looked like the men Sonny had caught himself looking at more. It was almost like he had predicted what he would look like, he had found himself looking at men that looked like him when they had worked together. It didn’t help that he had found himself going on dates but they never went further than a single date. They all seemed to treat him like he was less than him. 

It also didn’t help that the word across his wrist was “Hello” and no matter how many times he had tried to say something different, his job didn’t afford him that. And he would simply answer back “Hello”, “Hey” or “Hi”. So his soulmate probably hated him just as much as he hated himself. 

The longer he listened to his voice, the more his palms started to sweat and a lump formed in his throat, Liv looked up at him and smiled. 

He stood, unsure if he should leave as they continued to talk. But then Barba kept looking at him. The frown line between his brows deepening, then he spoke directly to him. “It’s not your case.” Sonny couldn’t take the way he leaned back, fingers running along the hair at his jaw. “Tell me which one. Just don’t let it be one of Stone’s, his cases are.” He never finished what he said, simply waved his hand dismissively. 

Pulling a chair round so he sat next to Liv and not looming over her and making Barba look at his face from a never flattering angle. He sorted through a few of the papers including the defences claim for the case being thrown out. 

“It’s the Anderson case. They are trying to have the ruling overturned, stating lack of evidence, that he shows great amounts of remorse and his lifelong prospects are going to be ruined. Along with his familys.” He sighed, his hand pulling at the ends of his hair. “It gets worse, they are wanting to use the fact that the girl he raped was unconscious and has limited to no memory of it happening means that it shouldn’t affect her.” 

Liv tensed up next to him, sucking in a deep breath and standing up. “I need a moment.” Walking towards the closed door before turning back, “I’m getting a coffee, I’m assuming you would like one.” It wasn’t a question and Sonny dug ten dollars out of his pocket to give her. Which got him the same look his Mom gave him when he tried to give her money. 

Slipping it back in his pocket, she smiled and left. Door shutting swiftly behind her. 

His eyes darted to the screen when Rafael burst out laughing, “I still remember that look.” He hadn’t even seen the look, “But yes that case was awful. I had to fight tooth and nail to get him a prison sentence. They kept trying to blame her for getting drunk, letting someone she didn’t know escort her home, saying that what she wore gave him the idea that consent was given. They tried every single outdated reason they could think of, the jury had none of it.” He watched as Barba took a drink from a ‘I heart NYC’ mug and found himself smiling, he had sent one of those to his Mother when he had left without anyone but Liv saying goodbye. 

Which he didn’t let himself think about. I hurt because he thought they were going somewhere, if drinking scotch together most Fridays and Saturdays was something. He had even attended one of his family gatherings around Christmas because his own mother wouldn’t take no as an answer. 

His parents had been ready for him to announce they were formally dating, but instead he had walked in. Jaw clenched muttering about how he had left the city without one word, had packed up and left before anyone could find out. 

“Thanks for this.” Barba smiled, tipping the cup at him. 

He wouldn’t let himself call him Rafael. It made the feelings become real, not something he would just push to the back of his mind. 

Sonny shrugged out of his jacket, letting it rest over the back. “So the case. They have got some absolute quack of a Phycologist who is willing to bring to the court that due to how she has adjusted to life easily since the incident, that the, “ Sonny air quotes, “Supposed trauma she experienced has been pushed upon her by men hating feminists, has now caused extreme trauma on Anderson as he has been abused by the American Adult prison system.” 

He groaned and picked up his phone, seeing that they had secured a date for the hearing in a little over a month. “And now I have a month to learn this case like the back of my hand, reinterview all the witnesses and hope I can get some of them to still testify.” Letting his elbows rest on the table, “We also have the issue of finding a jury that they will agree too.” 

He looked up, seeing Amanda looking in through the window her eyebrows raised. He felt his stomach flip, he didn’t have the feelings he had once had for her. But he still felt a sense of unease at the way she looked at him sometimes. He shook his head at her and she frowned, the look in her eyes that he was now a traitor. That he wouldn’t fight for every single case to court, but she hadn’t expected the other ADA’s they had too, just him. 

Focusing back on the screen and Barba wasn’t there, but he could hear rustling in the background. He couldn’t decide if his mouth went dry or he had to swallow, because Barba looked better. He had filled out in the best way, soft. But he sat down moving things around on the desk, “I am coming back to New York in...” He looks at his watch, “Three days. So if you fill out a consultation form it should be ready to go by the time I get there. So give me what you can, file number and I can have it ready to read on the flight.” 

Sonny took a few notes, which form and to make sure certain parts were filled in with personal information. While relaying case numbers and all the information he had managed to get from the Defence team. Rafael also recommended he pulls back from any large cases as the team they had on it were hard asses. And very rarely lost. 

Liv placed the cup on the desk and Sonny took a sip between words. He hadn’t loved just formulating a case since he had shadowed Rafael. 

She had smiled and moved close, her hair brushing his shoulder as she leaned over. “Well we look forward to you coming back. And I will see if we can get some others to work on cases.” She points a finger at him via the screen, “This case is important, it can’t start whatever narrative they are trying to push.” 

Both of them just nod and they go back to discussing the case. Liv pointed out things that could be used against them and said that she would get in contact with the victim, that it might be easier to hear from her. Than a lawyer. 

Sonny quickly took down Rafael’s number. Vowing to phone him on his journey back to his office, he stood slipping files back into his bag. Bidding them a quick goodbye, he texted Rafael as he left so he would know the number calling him was his. 

He stopped when he found both Amanda and Fin standing, eyes on him. He sighed and walked towards Fin, knowing Amanda would follow. “The Anderson case back. His team are trying to have it thrown out on some bullshit claims and I was just letting Liv know. And well you too.” 

Both their faces dropped. It had been an awful case and had taken them all a while to heal after it had happened, the evidence was horrific let alone the fact that he had recorded him doing it. Shared it online and had not only men, but young teen girls who liked him because he was an attractive teen had shamed the girl in the video and started the chant of ‘What a king wants, a king takes.’.

Amanda had spun around and made her way to Liv’s office, closing the door more forcefully than she had wanted. Fin just rested his hand on his shoulder, “We will help all we can.” He was holding back, it was visible in how tense his face was and how his other fist was clenching. 

The ride back in the Uber to the courthouse, wasn’t something he normally did but he wanted to be able to focus on running though the case with Rafael. He blinked rapidly when his shirt slipped up a little, pulling his watch up to and seeing the handwriting that curved over his skin. 

Lighter than what was around it, the hair worn away by the constant wearing of a watch to cover it. He knew that the word wasn’t just the first word his soulmate had said to him, but also their handwriting. 

He never looked at it. He would take his watch off to shower and clean at the end of everyday, but he would never flip his wrist to look at that single word Hello. 

Dodging people as he was on his way to his office, he picked up a bear dropped by a little girl. Her gap-toothed smile lit up the somber feeling that had settled over his shoulders. He told Rafael who laughed, and then continued to discuss the case. He had him on loud speaker as he filled in the forms, sent them off and then started working through hos they would disprove and discredit this doctor they were bringing in. 

Sonny was trying to find a doctor who would work with them, but it was proving hard. Neither of them knew someone and Liv said she would try a friend who used to work with inconstantly who had recently left the country. But she may be able to convince him to come back due to his knowledge and renown in the field. But if not he would be able to find her someone they could work with. They had debated contacting Doctor Huang, but they felt it was best to let him be. 

It wasn’t until Sonny heard Rafael yawn he realised they had been working for the last eight hours, “I’m sorry Rafael. It’s just this case it’s so difficult and so simple.” He catches himself yawning, “I don’t think I could do this without your help. Tuesday can’t come sooner.” 

He heard a deep breath being taken, “I will see you on Tuesday morning. Hopefully you haven’t destroyed my office.” A beat of silence and a stifled yawn, “I look forward to consulting on your case, Sonny.” Then he hung up. 

And by the grace of God Sonny was glad, his heart was racing. His palms were warm and damp. His mouth was dry and he tried to quell it with the cold coffee in his chipped mug. But he could feel the twist of Rafael saying his name in his ear, could see how his lips would move around the single word. It was a single inconsequential word. 

But it was his name. 

Coming out of the mouth of the man who had haunted every dream he had, made no man stand up to him. The sound made his knees weak and his mouth pull into an embarrassed smile. Too much teeth and the drag of his lip against them. It was all he could think about. 

It’s all he thought about on his way home. It made his skin feel too hot in his shower. It consumed his thoughts about how he could say that word differently. How he would say it in anger. Love. In deep throws of passion. Whispered in his ear like only a lover could. 

He imagined how it would sound when gasped in his ear, when they finally reached the climax they were driving for. 

He only stopped when he looked down at his hand. Wet, warm and sticky. 

He had three days to get it out of his system. 

Which would be easy. Sure it would. He just had to get off thinking about him enough times that he eventually became numb to the thought of him, the new feeling of a beard scraping along his neck. The burn that would from around his lips as he kissed him, it was damn stupid thinking of rough hands holding his waist, his thighs. The solid weight of this man on him, over him, in him. 

He was sure lusting after someone was not this normal, that not a single person could make him feel this hot and cold all at once. 

Sonny knew he should bring this up to someone, but how could he ask about these feelings and not give away who it was. He wasn’t that slick. Even his mother who had heard about Rafael once would work it out, she had looked at him odd when he spoke about him once. Like she knew there was more to this man than Sonny just looking up to him. 

His sisters were out of the question. Was anyone good enough that they wouldn’t tease him. Most likely no. 

So he found himself laying in his bed. Trying to force himself to sleep, he had to try and sleep. 

Nothing pissed him off more than being woken up by something that wasn’t his alarm, he was only focusing on his case and was not to be called unless it was an absolute necessity. He knew he would sound groggy and angry when he answered the phone. But there was no way he could care at three fifty four in the morning. 

“I know we aren’t meant to contact you.” A voice rang through the speaker, he couldn’t even place it. “But this case is eerily like the one you are about to retry. Like they have tried to copy it down to the exact words in the video.” He listened to a sigh, “I was told you should be called to come in. I’m Detective Kat Tamin, I’m new. I don’t think we have really met.” 

Rolling out of bed he started pulling on clothes. He listened as she talked a little more, saying how they had the boy from the video there and the girl was sitting in a room. Not letting a single person talk to her after she had been through the rape kit at the hospital. 

“I’ll be at the station as quick as I can.” He sighed, “Make sure all the cameras are on, the footage and sound will help us here. I have another call to make.” He checked his watch, Rafael was going to hate him. But it was something he needed to know, springing it on him when he got here would affect what he had planned out. 

He organised a Lyft to take him to the Station. Sitting in the seat he smiled at the girl driving, she raised an eyebrow trying to work out why someone would need a lift who was blatantly sober and not dressed to kill. She turned down the music when he lifted the phone to his ear. 

It rang and rang. Eventually going to a recorded message. He rolled his eyes and tried again, this time he got a sharp. “What are you calling me at this time in the morning for Sonny?” And he couldn’t speak, hearing his name said with that sleep filled rough voice and he had to pull the phone away and swallow. 

“I didn’t want to make this call, but I am on my way to the station.” He looked out the window, “It’s just they got a case, exact same circumstances as the Anderson case. But the girl went straight to the hospital. So we have her and him at the station now.” 

No words were said, but he could listen to the deep breaths being taken through the speaker. Licking his lips and watching buildings pass him much faster than he was used to, his hand never seemed to stop combing through his hair or pulling at his jeans. 

“Sonny. This case just got more complicated, I can change my flight to the first one back to New York.” He sighed loudly, “Send me what you can. I will go over it on the flight and head to the office. I will call when I am close.” Sonny pulled the phone away from his face, looked down and saw it was still connected. “Just know we will not let this case drop and I will do all I can to help you. I will see you this afternoon. Bye Sonny.”

“Bye Rafael.” He sighed, it sounded almost wistful, “I’ll see you then.” 

He stumbled out of the car, smiling brightly at the girl driving. And moving through the halls, staring at the cops and when he finally walked in. A woman stood up and walked right over to him, guiding him over to the side of her desk. She started talking through everything that she had got so far, telling him that Amanda and Fin were in with the perp and she had just left the young girl sitting with Olivia. 

Sighing he started sorting through what they had so far, he was sending off rapid text messages to Rafael. Letting him know all he could. Forwarding on the notes from the last case and getting messages back. It was slow and he moved into Liv’s office. Working through what he had. 

Watching the video made his stomach turn much like it had when he had seen Anderson’s one. They were as close to the same thing without being so. He had even chosen a girl that looked like a sibling of the one from the original video. He knew that watching it once wasn’t going to be an option. But thankfully he wouldn’t have to study it all too much, no longer working as a cop had some positive points. 

He was on what could have been his hundredth cup of coffee when he heard his cell ringing under the piles of paper he and Liv were working through. He stood, hearing every joint in his body crack and answered. 

“I will be at the office in around half an hour.” He smiled at the fact he wasn’t welcomed with a hello. “So should I get us some food, that Thai place is still open and it is the best.” Sonny got the feeling it wasn’t a question, it was him being told and his heart fluttered at the thought. 

“Yeah, sounds good.” Liv smiled at him and rolled her eyes, “I’ll pack up what I have so far and get the coffee.” 

He was sitting in a Lyft again, watching how slow the city that never stopped was. He was sorting through a few of the notes, making them secure in his briefcase and being thankful of the new Detective’s neat streak. 

He couldn’t say when he got used to the wake up, go for a run, drink coffee and walk into the office had all suddenly included Rafael. He almost always woke up receiving a text or an email from him, meeting him at the front of his building to go run. One of them picking up a coffee for the other and walking in talking about the case. 

But it was three days before the case when he realised he was doing more for Rafael than he had than any person he had tried to date recently. 

Standing in his office, he had stopped mid speech to look at Rafael, he had stumbled over a single word and he was frustrated. But the look he saw and him trip over nothing. He had to control himself but his eyes fell on his wrist, not something he had really let himself look at before. He could see the dark colour of his words. 

Thinking ahead was never one of Sonny’s strong points outside of the courtroom. Because the next thing he found himself doing was pushing his sleeves up, pulling his tie loose and walking over to take a swig of his stone cold coffee. He pulled his watch off, he was getting frustrated because they wouldn’t lose this case but they also didn’t know what the Anderson’s would pull. They were with a family with more power and money than anyone needed. 

It had been the reason that their darling son had tried to say that the girl he had hurt was his soulmate, had even tried to stop her from showing her mark. Saying it would be traumatising for her. Rafael had done everything to get him the maximum. Which he had. The judge wanting to show that just because he had everything and was white wouldn’t stop him from getting what he deserved. 

A warm hand had him jump and drop his cup, the liquid puddled over the desk. Nothing was there to stop it from dripping over the edge. He just watched it. 

“Sonny.” It was a gentle way he had never heard his name sound from his lips. He turned. Slowly letting the hand drag round so it was on his chest. The world was slow. Finally. Sitting on the edge of the desk and looking at him. HIs hands were shaking where he placed them on his thighs. “We are going to win. It’s much easier this time, we are just trying to keep him in. Not trying to get him convicted.”  
Sonny couldn’t help himself from placing a hand over Rafael’s, watching as his nostrils flared with the deep breath he let out. He felt him move closer, his hip brushing against his   
knee. Breathing deep he reached out, feeling the rough hair covering most of his cheek. He was slow in his movements, so that if it was too much he could back away, but he didn’t want to talk so to break the tension in the room. 

His legs spread letting Rafael move closer, his other hand touching his hip and a shaky breath left him. 

“We really shouldn’t” Rafael spoke, his thumb rubbing over the bone there and making him the never ending voice of reason. 

“I know.” 

When he finally kissed him, it was different. He had a full beard which hadn’t really been there when he had first started thinking about this. It was good, hot and lush. He had complete control of Sonny in seconds, moving him how he wanted him. Using his tongue to have him moaning and trying to get closer. Teeth pulled at his lip and he grabbed roughly onto his shirt, pulling him close. 

Rafael pulled back and looked at him, his eyes searching Sonny's face. And Sonny knew he had to be smiling like a dope, he licked his own lips and thought of what he had finally done. 

“Hello.” Rafael whispered, his thumb dragging across Sonny’s lip. 

He flicked his tongue out to catch it, “Yeah.” 

And then it was over, Rafael backed up and pulled his suspenders from his shoulders, “I wasn’t going to do that till after we finished this case. Till we weren’t working together anymore.” He turned to look at him, “Was going to. But when does it go to plan.” He walked forward quickly, hand grasping at Sonny’s marked arm and turned it over. 

Sonny just looked over his shoulder at the bookcase, he didn’t want to see that the word wasn’t his. Not when he felt the way he did and had just been kissed by someone who had haunted his dreams for years. He just wanted this one moment to think that it could be this one man. That he could be happy forever with one man. 

“Okay.” He whispered before placing his hand back down. “We finish this case and I am taking you to some little mom and pops restaurant.” Sonny let his eyes fall to him and was pulled back into a kiss. 

One that had him wishing he could be laid out on his back on this desk. Have Rafael pull him close by his hips, bite at his chest and finger him till he screamed. And just when he thought he would cum, pull back and smirk down at him. That smirk he used in court when he knew he had won his case. And thrust right into him. Making him feel full and like he had finally lost his mind. 

But instead he heard their lips part. Watched as rafael walked out carrying his coat, a smile he had never seen before; but wanted to see more of. 

It was maddening waiting till after the case was done. It was a solid week of making girls talk about how their friend was still scared to go out alone in the daylight let alone the dark. How she had lost all trust in men, even those she used to trust. He had kept his eye on the jury as Anderson smirked and rolled his eyes through the details. Saw revulsion in some as he reiterated how if she hadn't known she would be fine. 

If he hadn’t videoed this one happening nothing would have happened. 

Fin had stood up sharply at that comment, knowing what it implied and at the end of the day they were told of a few girls coming during the day. They had seen the coverage and said they were sure he was the one who had hurt them. By the time he was back in court the next morning they had viable proof of him attacking four other girls, who had been sent pictures or videos. 

The case went through without a hitch and Sonny found himself getting ready to add on the charges from the other girls. 

But the best part was Sonny walking into his office, Rafael following him in after. Locking the door. Closing the blinds and kissing him like he had been craving it as much as Sonny had. The height difference was making Sonny’s neck hurt, but he just didn’t care.

**Author's Note:**

> I have taken far too long to write this. But I have taken two separate cases from real life. The first was the attack of an unconscious girl by a guy who got less time than we have spent in our house in the past weeks. The other is a guy who recorded himself attacking a girl and posted it on TikTok, the words i used him saying are from that. 
> 
> I hope that no one is affected by this, I used this story to get my own personal feelings out. Which is probably why it took so long.


End file.
